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Bugger but this was a busy weekend. Saturday I had plans to go to Chinatown, NY with friends which fell through so instead we went to Mitsuwa Market and purchased stuff. But before that I decided randomly in the morning to take my sprog to the festival which was happening locally. We had a grand time and I spent too much money on them as usual. Celia really loves horseback riding and got to ride a pony. The other two wanted to play in the bouncy houses. All three of them broke open a geode which was cute and we shared a funnel cake. It was a fun little trip. .So after that trip my friends dropped in and we went to Mitsuwa and had a blast. I had set up a tattoo appointment at 8 so we had to book it home and than book it straight to NP. I had a sort of half way constructed idea that my artist was able to bring to breathtaking beauty on my forearm. I feel pretty solid now so no more tattoos for a while until I can get the ones I have scheduled for other parts of my body done.
My new tat is of my cat Lady sitting and licking her paw and the shadow she casts behind her is a dragon doing the same. It looks fucking amazing and I'm so glad I went with the artist I went with. The spider on my other arm is in the icky peeling stage which means it looks like crap but seems to be healing nicely. My Lady cat tat is slightly larger and has more ink involved. The skin is a bit red but doesn't look abnormal in any way. I'll get pictures up tomorrow.
Today was GiGis surprise shower which went off pretty well actually. Made sure I called Scott who was getting very bitchy about my constant not calling. I understand and all but well it is the busy season and I have a really full life. Anyhow I promised to go to Albany soon and we scheduled a Zoo trip for the two of us on the 23rd though I'm only sort of interested. I want to go but he seems to think we are going to see the entire zoo. Strange boy that one.
So back to the shower today. I'm still dealing with my strange overriding fatigue so I tried to be as helpful as possible when I could manage to be awake and upright. I'm off to the doctor tomorrow. All sorts of fun that should be. A couple of my housemates seem to think I might be depressed or that I have a lot of the symptoms of depression. I mean I guess I could be. I don't feel depressed or at least not my normal variety of depressed. I'm aggravated and annoyed at some things and really fucking frustrated but I don't feel sad really just kind of pissed. Fuck that not just pissed but royally angry. I even know I shouldn't feel angry but I do feel it and it seems so odd to me that being angry is a form of depression. I just want to hit things over and over again and scream and cry and just so fucking angry. Like I'm just so angry and mad and I guess a little bit sad I don't know what to do about things but I'm getting most of the things I set for myself to do done. Anyhow I'm wondering if my meds aren't working right or something. So now I need to schedule another doctor appointment with a head shrink who can drug me. Oh Joy... I've always been a bit angry though. I mean not about what is bothering me right now. That is a whole new thing but I'm an aggressive, violent person inside. My happy fluffy thoughts are drenched in blood and gore. That's just how I'm wired. But maybe I'm more angry than normal vein for me. I don't know. I felt I was actually getting back to what was normal for me, the anger and rage, while getting away from the soul sucking sadness. *sighs* Why is it again I feel this is worth it?
Sleep now.
My new tat is of my cat Lady sitting and licking her paw and the shadow she casts behind her is a dragon doing the same. It looks fucking amazing and I'm so glad I went with the artist I went with. The spider on my other arm is in the icky peeling stage which means it looks like crap but seems to be healing nicely. My Lady cat tat is slightly larger and has more ink involved. The skin is a bit red but doesn't look abnormal in any way. I'll get pictures up tomorrow.
Today was GiGis surprise shower which went off pretty well actually. Made sure I called Scott who was getting very bitchy about my constant not calling. I understand and all but well it is the busy season and I have a really full life. Anyhow I promised to go to Albany soon and we scheduled a Zoo trip for the two of us on the 23rd though I'm only sort of interested. I want to go but he seems to think we are going to see the entire zoo. Strange boy that one.
So back to the shower today. I'm still dealing with my strange overriding fatigue so I tried to be as helpful as possible when I could manage to be awake and upright. I'm off to the doctor tomorrow. All sorts of fun that should be. A couple of my housemates seem to think I might be depressed or that I have a lot of the symptoms of depression. I mean I guess I could be. I don't feel depressed or at least not my normal variety of depressed. I'm aggravated and annoyed at some things and really fucking frustrated but I don't feel sad really just kind of pissed. Fuck that not just pissed but royally angry. I even know I shouldn't feel angry but I do feel it and it seems so odd to me that being angry is a form of depression. I just want to hit things over and over again and scream and cry and just so fucking angry. Like I'm just so angry and mad and I guess a little bit sad I don't know what to do about things but I'm getting most of the things I set for myself to do done. Anyhow I'm wondering if my meds aren't working right or something. So now I need to schedule another doctor appointment with a head shrink who can drug me. Oh Joy... I've always been a bit angry though. I mean not about what is bothering me right now. That is a whole new thing but I'm an aggressive, violent person inside. My happy fluffy thoughts are drenched in blood and gore. That's just how I'm wired. But maybe I'm more angry than normal vein for me. I don't know. I felt I was actually getting back to what was normal for me, the anger and rage, while getting away from the soul sucking sadness. *sighs* Why is it again I feel this is worth it?
Sleep now.
