Apartment hunting, Moving and disturbing dreams of my father

So finally broke the strange sleep cycle which tormented me this week. If I can just keep it up through the weekend I should be ok. I am now apartment hunting for the move and I've had WAY too much coffee today. LOL I am practically vibrating at my desk and boy does that sound wrong. Think I have as much of the school stuff done as I can do. Well think I still need to send the imunization shite in. Take care of that this weekend I guess. I'm gonna start pulling boxes apart and repacking them as well. Probably start packing books and non essential stuff soon too. Don't feel like deal with it like last time. Have to figure out how we are splitting the furniture and things we've purchased together with Jen also. Oh the fun.

I'm actually looking forward to the move. Albany holds nothing else for me anymore though I'm gonna miss people up here. Atleast I'll be close enough to visit at times. Unlike Cape and the other billion places I've lived before. Good thing I kept ties in NE to a minimum, I seldom go back there.

I had a strange and fairly disturbing dream about my father last night. He was dying and I had gone to see him. I do believe it is time I track him down. The last time I had these weird thoughts my grandmother died within 6 months and I never got to say goodbye. Funny she was the only one of my bioligical family from that side I really liked. Or atleast had a chance to like. I actually know almost none of my bioligical family. I haven't even met or heard about anyone from my mom's side. They didn't get along and so I've never met them. And I've met people on my fathers side but we were never close. Only my grandmother did I really like. Never met either grandfather. It is kinda strange since most of my friends have atleast known their parents if not been fairly close. I have two uncles. One I've nevermet (mothers side) and one who I loved when a child and then hated as I grew older (father's side). One aunt who I don't like all the much or didn't when I was a kid (father's side). A billion cousins most I've never known (father's side) who knows what is on my mothers side. It's all very weird honestly. Weird to hear people talk about their families. Big or small all very weird. I don't mention it to my mom, she gets weird about it sometimes as if I'm insulting her, as if I'm saying she's not enough. Considering our relationship I don't know if I'm not or what I'm saying when I ask. Our relationship has always been so strange. I doubt it will ever not be. She has a habit of not listening to what I am saying. I think it is because we don't live near each other. She has problems believing I'm not the same exact person I was when I was younger. Oh well it'll all work out. I'm not too worried about it things are better with her. Strange what qualifies as better.

So I need to ask her for my cousins phone number again and brave talking with them so that I can find out if they ever tracked my father down. I can't let this go I think. I would hate for my father to die before I got to talk to him again. If only for the memories I have from being a kid. He was a good friend then. I needed a father but he was what he could be and he gave me what he could. He shouldn't have ever had a kid but I remember lots of good times from when I was a small child and lots of bad times from when I was older. I'd like to think he might be proud of me now. Not that I'm great or anything and I'm certainly not a very successful person but I'm not too horrible.

Anyhow enough mudlin thoughts while at work. It was a really disturbing dream though. I guess I've let this all sit for too long.

Ganked cause I'm bored

The Rules:
1. You can only say YES or NO!
2. You are NOT ALLOWED to explain ANYTHING
unless someone comments to the entry and asks.

Taken a picture naked? Yes
Made out with a member of the same sex? Yes
Danced in front of your mirror? Yes
Told a lie? Yes
Gotten in a car with people you just met? Yes
Been in a fist fight? Yes
Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back? Yes
Been arrested? Yes
Left your house without telling your parents? Yes
Ditched school to do something more fun? Yes
Slept in a bed with a member of the same sex? Yes
Seen someone die? Yes
Kissed a picture? Yes
Slept in until 3? Yes
Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by? Yes
Played dress up? Yes
Fallen asleep at work/school? Yes
Felt an earthquake? Yes
Touched a snake? Yes
Ran a red light? Yes
Had detention? Yes
Been in a car accident? Yes
Pole danced? Yes
Been lost? Yes
Sang karaoke? Yes
Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? Yes
Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? Yes
Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Yes
Kissed in the rain? Yes
Sang in the shower? Yes
Got your tongue stuck to a pole? No
Ever gone to school partially naked? No
Sat on a roof top? Yes
Played chicken? Yes
Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? Yes
Been told you're hot by a complete stranger? Yes
Broken a bone? No
Mooned/flashed someone? Yes
Forgotten someone's name? Yes
Slept naked? Yes
Blacked out from drinking? No
Played a prank on someone? Yes
Felt like killing someone? Yes
Made a parent cry? Yes
Cried over someone? Yes
Had sex more than 5 times in one day? Yes
Had/Have a dog? Yes
Been in a band? No
Drank 25 sodas in a day? No
Shot a gun? No


Damnit need more questions.