seorgia: (Emotion: Power)
( Feb. 21st, 2009 12:56 am)
Ever get paranoid that you aren't really wanted around? When you are upset, no one says anything. When you are sick, no one says anything. When you are around, no ones says anything really but you feel like they want to or that you are just some strange burden.

I think I need to stop being sick. It is making me paranoid. But You aren't paranoid if it is all true. Great. Perfect. Just what I need.
My stomach seems to think it wants food. I suspect it is lying and trying to trick me into feeding it. Yesterday's experiment in eating went so well I'm a little leery of trying it today.

I think I feel up to wandering out and looking for people though. Gonna go shower and wander the hotel halls. Maybe attempt the whole food-thing, maybe not.
seorgia: (Seo: Iron Chef Makai)
( Feb. 21st, 2009 07:15 pm)
SO I actually left my room today. I had the maids clean up which just reminds me of how much I love having maids. Not that I left them a huge mess. I was polite enough to pick up all the tissues and such before I left. They really aren't paid for that sort of thing. Well technically they are but not really. Right so I'm now super tired. I've managed to keep down the food I ingested today. Once again I started feeling better after I puked. I should just stop fighting vomiting so hard, I always feel better afterward.

I won nunchuku(sp?) at the auction here which is nice. I don't know how to use them and I doubt I'll ever learn but they are pretty and I like weapons of all forms. The dagger I REALLY wanted went to someone else but *shrugs* the money was raised for a good cause. I'm only half sure what it is but I know it is going somewhere good.

The funny part of the day was right in the beginning when I left the room. Evidently, everyone was informed that I was down sick so when I ever I ran into somebody they said some variation on "Oh you're alive" or "Oh you aren't dead". LOL It got to be hilarious after a short bit of time. Jay was telling me how he went down and listened at my door during some point to see if I was alright (why he didn't knock I didn't ask) and he decided one of two things had happened. One, I was alive but not screaming and therefore okay or two, I was dead but not screaming and therefore not a problem. LOL I love Jay. My voice is shot and I'm pretty weak but otherwise okay. I kinda want to take a quick nap before this evenings activities. I also kind of want to go swimming so um hmm not sure which I'll do. Oh other funny part of the day was during boffer weapons. Dickens was out fighting (which was cool to see) and managed to nail some dude right in the balls. HAHAHAHA I about died laughing. I spoke to him afterward about how he has managed to cause someone real damage at the con now and he was like "Yep the con is officially perfect for me right now. Done, I am happy." LOL It was fucking great.

So I've checked the schedule and nothing I care to go to is going on for a while. There is the dance later but I'm not sure I can be arsed to go. The con is fun and all but I've decided I'm really not a damned pagan anymore. I'm a freak and I like hanging out with Vampires and Otherkin but I cannot be arsed with all this religious goddess and god shit anymore. I guess my relationship with deities is my own and not up for much discussion. Plus I went to this workshop about our "shadow" side earlier today and if I heard one more person babbling about right hand path crap I was going to start punching people. *shakes head* "Rule of three whan whan whan". Please save me from these damned white lighter, nature loving, cattle. Oh and seriously this place is even worse about the whole "This is how you cast a circle. This is how you form an energy ball." Yawn. Not saying I haven't gotten into more then a few fun discussions but so far the classes really aren't for me. Plus I feel sort of bad going into these places and fucking with others world views. And the drama hasn't changed a bit. It is weird how different freak groups have different flavors of drama and those flavors never really change. *shrugs*

SO yeah I doubt I'll go to convocation next year. I have more fun at the Khep gathers and WtT. I'd rather save my money and go hang out with people who aren't freaked by such a simple concept as multiples. No lie the lady holding the Shadow Workshop like shivered and was mentioning how freaky it was to see a multiple shift. *shrugs* I think my weird-shit-o-meter is just set too high nowadays. I am having fun though.

So sleep for me.
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